Choices

I've repeatedly heard the question posed to children, "What do you want to be when you grow up?" I remember thinking about this when I was a child and I had no idea what I wanted to be. Even up to my junior year of high school I didn't have a clue. I went to my guidance counselor when I was a senior. She asked me what interests or hobbies I had. Since I had been knitting and crocheting since I was a child I told her that these were my favorite hobbies. After some thought, she suggested I pursue the study of textile science at an Ivy League University nearby. Since that seemed to make sense, I chose to go that route.

In order to save money I went to our local community college for two years. Then I transferred to the University. During my first semester I realized that this was not the route I wanted to take. This major involved quite a bit of biochemistry which was not my forte. I then made a choice to change majors.

Eventually, I studied Human/Environment Analysis which involved designing environments for people with different needs such as the elderly or disabled. In the meantime I also studied Industrial and Labor Relations. I felt myself moving into territory that was foreign to me. Most of these students eventually climbed the ladder of success in big cities. It was here that I met someone who had those ambitions and wanted to succeed at any cost.

He was a year behind me and, after I graduated, he urged me to pursue my MBA since, if we were to be married, he wanted his wife to carry a briefcase to work. In my naivete I went ahead and took the Graduate Management Test. Here I was, a simple girl from a simple family whose parents worked within walking distance of our home. I loved my home and friends and I wasn't comfortable with the idea of living in New York City. It was then that my boyfriend told me that he wanted to marry me, but I would have to understand that I would never be #1 in his life; his career would be. That's when I chose to stay in my hometown even if I had to work in a fast food place. It was a choice that, to this day, was one of the wisest I've ever made.

After working in a personnel office for two years I decided that, since I still lived home, I wanted to go back to school and get a degree in Electronic Technology. It was something that always fascinated me and it was the right time to pursue it.

I studied very hard to succeed at it and to forget the earlier years. I never regretted leaving him, but the future was an open book that terrified me.

After graduating with my degree, I landed a job at a copier repair company. The job came with a company car, and my new boss sent another employee to pick me up since I would get my car later that day.

Imagine my surprise when a former schoolmate of mine pulled into my driveway. We had gone to elementary and high school together He lived less than two miles away from me all of my life, but by some divine intervention we met again. We became good friends at the company and talked about people we both knew. My mother was his teacher in fourth grade. I remember his little brother in Kindergarten when my mother taught that grade. Here was someone that was down to earth and had his priorities straight. Our friendship grew, and we have now been married almost 16 years.

It's amazing how choices we've made in the past affect us for the rest of our lives. IF I had pursued Textile Science; IF I had foolishly followed what's-his-name to New York City; IF I hadn't gotten my degree in Electronics; IF I hadn't gotten the job at the copier company. Any misstep would have changed the way my life turned out dramatically.

I know that the life that I have now is the one I wanted from the start. I still live in the same area, I married someone who has the same values as I do, and our children are learning those values from us. I can call my mom anytime I want and visit her often since she only lives 20 minutes away. I have a fantastic job that I love. I've had the chance to move up, but this position works perfectly for me.

I realize now, looking back, that the choices we make in our lives, along with fate, determines the course of the rest of our lives.

I have everything I want.